Thursday, June 11, 2009

When I Grow Up

I don't know what I want to be. I keep thinking, well, more like hoping, that one day it will just hit me in the face and be unbelievably clear. So far this theory hasn't worked.
The other day on Regis and Kelly, this guy was on who is an actor in some show on TNT or something like that. He was 44 or something and he was saying he still wasn't sure that he wanted to be an actor. Well, that just threw off my whole plan! How can someone who is 44 not know what they want to be when they grow up? They are grown up!
I guess that's the case for a lot of people though, isn't it? Plenty of people who have well-established careers and even make lots of money aren't necessarily happy with what they are doing.
I don't want that to happen to me. Ten or twenty or thirty years from now, I don't want to be sitting around wondering whether I chose the right thing. Is that possible? People say "no regrets" and "don't look back," but do those people really go through their lives without questioning a single decision they made? I just don't think that's possible. But maybe it is. It's definitely not for me.
So what do I want to be when I grow up? There are so many things I like, so many things I find interesting, fascinating, even, but how do I know which one I want to do forever? Technically I guess I don't have to do anything forever, but which of my many interests do I want to put time into? Which ones do I want to put my money into as far as getting an education? I have no idea.
So I guess I'm back at square one.
What I wouldn't give to be eleven forever.


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